Well, as I've continued to sit and stew about this whole SYTYCD thing, a couple realizations have come to me. Mostly, the fact of the matter is, while I do want to do this audition thing for myself, I mostly want to do it because someone who I look down on as a dancer did it, and I feel the need to prove myself as better than her. I don't think this is a positive rationalization for doing anything. Secondly, I have received some very strong signs in the past hour to further steer me away from thinking I should audition.
1-I was accepted to the NCUR (National Council of Undergraduate Research) held in Maryland the 2nd week of April. I had already been accepted for UCUR (Utah's...) which is an accomplishment in itself, but now I am committed to not only the trip, but the necessary preparation to present at such a conference. I actually got accepted for two different research submissions, one in Dance History, and one in Dance Kinesiology. If I were to make it through to Vegas, I would have to reschedule my finals to take them early, but now I won't be able to reschedule them due to my (school paid) trip to Maryland.
2-My partner for my auditions informed me that he wouldn't be able to miss school in order to try out with me. I could do something besides Ballroom, but honestly, I'm rusty, and even at my peak I would have a hard time competing with all the studio babies in Utah. There are 10 year olds that dance for Center Stage, Vibe, Winner School, etc that could kick my trash, let alone those recently graduated seniors who are dying to go professional. My jazz, contemporary, and tumbling need to be the back-up to my ballroom, but none are strong enough to stand alone for my audition.
I realize these posts aren't fun...but I figure rather than having this conversation 12 times with every member of my family and circle of friends, I can just put my thoughts here, and you can comment or ignore me until I post something exciting...
Love you all...I'm eager to hear your input.
10 months ago